Log:What We Are
What We Are
OOC Date: 12 Feb 2016 (Optional)
Location: Common Room - Waywards
Participants: Jax Greystorm, A'isha Adella, Maeve Zavir
The common room for the Waywards is designed to give a safe place to relax and entertain. Holochess boards, tables, sofas, even a small stage are all part of the room along with a long bar lining one of the walls, monitored by a droid bartender who is always on duty. Music is provided from an entertainment center in the corner with selections from across the galaxy.
The door hisses open and the slender Lethan slips into the the room. She is in her scout gear, armed and carries a messenger type bag on one hip. She moves with that smooth, slightly predatory grace that marks Red, as opposed to the catwalk strut that defines her Other. The golden eyes are bright, nearly molten. Her Lekku switch from side to side, then entangle and release. Like the tails of annoyed pair of cats....
Seated before the holo chess board, one elbow propped on the edge of the table and the other hovering just above the board itself, Mae has a frown of intense concentration upon her face. Her fingertips twitch faintly above the piece that she's hesitating over and, in that moment of hesitation, she glances up to the sound of the door hissing open and aims a smile at Red. "Hey, A'isha, you're looking . ." she tips her head slightly to the side, "hm. Keyed up?"
Jax has appeared out of somewhere and is here playing holochese with Mae. Where does he come from? Where does he go? He doesn't often say but this time he doesn't have Sesti with him. He's also raided the good booze and drinking Ax's whiskey. "I wouldn't make that move." He says as Mae tries to decide which move to make. Jax calls out to A'isha, "Hey Red." Not really knowing there's more than one 'Red.'
That felid gaze meets Maeve's then Jax's, in turn. Her Lekku settle, perhaps by effort. "Maeve, I am...well. It has been an...eventful day. I came by to get a drink a spool down." She looks as Jax "It has been long since I have seen you. How's the Good Guys going?" A flash of white teeth, punctuate by sharp canines. She strolls to the table, soudless in her mvements, as ever.
Maeve twitches those same fingertips above the chess piece then frowns at Jax, "You wouldn't. But see, that's why it's what I should do," backward logic at it's best. She moves the chess piece anyway before turning back to A'isha, "Eventful doesn't always mean good, sometimes it means bad, sometimes it means..." and she gets up and crosses to the bar to snag a glass for Red. "What kind of drink?"
Jax shrugs, "That or I wouldn't make that move cause I'm not you or maybe a damn good holo chess player." He says as he makes a move while Mae is up. The computer keeps him from making two. He takes a drink of his whiskey, "Hey Red. I haven't since we went cave splunking. You guys been back?"
"Today it meant....Other." Red hisses a soft laugh through sharp teeth. "I am ok, just annoyed. Brandy will do well, I think." She eyes Jax. "yes that was a mess, next time; exposives and weapons of Mass Destruction." She leans on the wall by the table, arms crossed, legs crossed at ankles. Her posture is elaborately casual. Her Lekku switch, softly. She watches the game with an alert, feline intensity. "I...never learned to play."
Fetching the bottle of brandy, one of the, at least, Mae pours a healthy amount into the glass and caps the bottle again before she carries it over to Red. "Explosives and what?" she wonders, aiming a frown and slightly perplexed look from Red to Jax and back. "I understand the words, mind, but what are you guys talking about?" she wonders before filling her glass as well and dropping back into the chair on her side of the table and frowns at the placement of pieces again, where she is yet another piece fewer than before. "I'm trying to learn how to play, so far I'm learning how to lose. Repeatedly."
Jax takes a sip of the whiskey and snaps, "I showed you how to play. It's not my fault your not picking it up." He says as he turns pale. His breath becoming more labored and he was green to the gills. "It that damn jedi crap Ax got us going on. Where Galak just about got killed by Sithspawn bugs." He breaking into a cold sweat.
Sharp eyes of Molten Bronze meiss little. Red is, for want of a better term, an Assassin. Such depend on awareness. A frown downcurves full lips, hiding those so-white, so-sharp teeth. She stands and, again casually, walks to meet Maeve, tanking the offered drink with a bright smile, the frown vanishing. "Yes, large, nuerous and vicious. I personally think an Orbital bombardment would be for the best. But, Artifacts..." That last word, was there bitterness on that vevelet soft voice? She leans agains the far end of the bar, as if searhing the stock of drinks. In reality she watches Jax carefully now using mirror behind the bar.
Picking up a peanut, Mae casually pitches it at Jax, "Shush, oh grand master of chess," before she sobers subtly and reaches across the table to pinch him, just a quick jolt to his nervous system. "Slow deep breath in, count to three, then exhale for five. Repeat, as necessary," she advises in a quiet, and terribly calm, tone of voice as she looks back up to Red. "Personally, I hate spiders, arachnids or anything creepity crawlie with a passion. Ax is considering capturing one of those damn things so I can create a species specific toxin to kill them all at once instead of risking you guys trying to kill them in a sudden slaughter fest. I think a few well placed charges, AFTER we've dispatched the live ones, is a good idea. After fetching what ever artifacts might be down there. Or might not."
Jax Greystorm tests his Dodge Ranged skill at a 100 difficulty. +SUCCESS+ (61).
Jax dodges the peanut that comes flying at him, "I don't know what's wrong with you but if your going to act like this I'm not going to play with you, Sore looser." Then when Mae reaches across the table and pinches him, he draws up ready to punch her. Though the pain causes to break his train of thought. He looks at her a bit confused. " Mae.. I'm sorry. Don't know what's wrong. Did I just it got hot in here." He looks up a bit worried at A'isha.
Maeve tests her Knowledge:medicine skill at a 100 difficulty. +SUCCESS+ (80).
Red is silent for a long while, watching them in the mirror. If one chances to look closely, very closely indeed as they would have to be watching her reflection in the bar mirror, they might see emotions cross thoe elfin features. Loss, Pain, Bitternes. But when she turns back, of these there are no traces. She moves to the door, as far away as one can get in this room. It hisses open, sensing her presence. "I...think I know. Tell me Jax, do you feel better now?" Her voice is soft, calm, musical. Without inflection though.....
With a mild flinch, Mae evades the swing that Jax takes at her as she replies: "You experienced what I believe to be a panic attack, the brief jolt of unexpected and non-harmful pain was enough to startle you out of it. A simple elastic band around your wrist that you can snap against your skin is another good way that you can break yourself out of any mild or even moderate to intense panic attack," Mae advises in a quiet voice. She turns toward Red and glances from Red to Jax then back again, "What am I missing?"
Jax Greystorm tests his Intelligence skill at a 150 difficulty. +SUCCESS+ (64).
Jax looks at A'isha and then Mae. Then back to A'isha. "Yeah I do. I'm acting like Ax did. You got what ever it is on you don't you. No.... NO."
Red watches his reaction, head tilted, Lekku waving gracefully, calmly, slowly. Her eyes are wide, gleaming brightly. Not the tarnished gold of A'isha. "I do. I...we..find it hard to leave behind." Her tone softens and questioning note rising in that soft, smoky voice. "You as well? You all feel it as Evil, Dark." She shakes her head. "To me, to Her, there is...a coolness, it is comforting. Why is that? What does it say of me, of..." She blinks rapidly. tears gleam now on her cheeks. "Are we That Broken?" She step into the doorway, as if to leave. "He said it, that little red man. There are no Coincidences. That I was just like Her, the one in that box..." Her voice fades, she starts to turn away....
Jax reaches out for A'isha, "Please don't go. A'isha you are my friend. I don't know. I don't know anything about any of this. I believe in the force but not this. But I know you are a sweet, loving, young woman. YOu are not evil. You're not broken." Well she is but so is everyone on Nar Shaddaa. I don't know who your talking about. I don't know anything about boxes or red men. I don't know poodoo about Jedi or sith. But I know you're Love and caring. Love is never evil. So you're not evil."
Wearing an expression that conveys a healthy measure of perplexity, and an even equally healthy dose of confusion, Mae is frowning first at Red then back around to Jax then back again. "Ahh," as the dots start to line up and connect for the doctor. "If I may interject?" she offers quietly, "I don't think either of you are evil, I'm actually not convinced in the concrete proof of universal absolutes of good versus evil, let alone anything else. But you're not evil, Red," reaching out to Red as well and rests one hand lightly on one of her elbows. "And walking out won't make you feel better about what ever it is that's happening, it'll only make you feel more isolated. Isolation feelings have a nasty way of doubling back on themselves and creating a negative feedback loop."
Red stiffens ever so slightly at the touch, Lekku shivering, emphaszing the reaction. She takes a deep breath. "You do not know, what I have done." She sinks back against the door frame. it heisses shut once she is clear. "We were young, so young and happy. M'ressa was our master, to our apprentice. Then the Bad Men came. She hid me, refused to tell them where I was. They...totured her, Killed her. She died keeping me safe. I could do nothing. Not even cry. Just...watched. They set the fire and I...we fled...." Voice soft, tiny, almost childish. Her eyes are closed, as she relives the memories...screaming, harsh shouts and laughter. She opens them, this time they can see the color change, tarnished gold going bright. Her voice changes too. Still soft, but, a sense of menace. "I...did what I had to do. To never be that weak, that helpless ever again." SHe looks at the two of them. "I learned, oh the things I learned." Voice whisper soft, a ghost's whisper. Chilling. "I found them, those men. I made them Pay....." She blinks slowly, tears streaming unnoticed. "We came here, after. I found It here as well." Her hand touches the pouch at her side. "I kept it, but it makes Ax and Narsai and Jax sick to be near. But not me. Why is that?"
Picking up a peanut, Mae casually pitches it at Jax, "Shush, oh grand master of chess," before she sobers subtly and reaches across the table to pinch him, just a quick jolt to his nervous system. "Slow deep breath in, count to three, then exhale for five. Repeat, as necessary," she advises in a quiet, and terribly calm, tone of voice as she looks back up to Red. "Personally, I hate spiders, arachnids or anything creepity crawlie with a passion. Ax is considering capturing one of those damn things so I can create a species specific toxin to kill them all at once instead of risking you guys trying to kill them in a sudden slaughter fest. I think a few well placed charges, AFTER we've dispatched the live ones, is a good idea. After fetching what ever artifacts might be down there. Or might not."
Jax shakes his head as he can't hug A'isha. There is a physical wall between him and her or it feels like it. But he fights the pain to touch her. "Oh Red. I'm so sorry. You're not alone and you're not there with them. You're with people who love and care for you. Strand, Lorana, the rest of the Waywards." He looks pained as he talks. It's being close to the lightsaber. "But remember, you are you you are not force to be somebody long gone. If I had to be an Asshole Corellian cause I looked like one. The galaxy would be doomed. But you always got the choice to choose." He looks at her, "There are two ways to look at it. If you believe in the Sith. Maybe that thing is sentinet and trying to drive you away from others so it can have you to itself. If Ax is right. The other option, maybe people like Ax and me can feel all the bad things done with it. You simple can't cause you don't have that sense. It comforts you cause it represents a good built weapon and protection. Like my blaster to me. It doesn't mean your broke. You just can't feel things and you see it as representing protection."
While Jax is speaking to Red, reassuring her really, Mae unclips the medpack from her side and flips the case open long enough to unfold a sealed compartment and extracts a single scalpel before she turns back to Red and extends one hand, the scalpel resting on the flat of her hand. "The weapon that you're carrying is, by all reported tales and fables, an exquisitely crafted weapon. A weapon, like any blade, can be put to good use as well as deliberately harm. With this scalpel, I cut into the bodies of those who need surgical intervention. On it's own, it's a wicked, keen blade, capable of inflicting so much damage that I could as easily kill as heal. I make a choice, every time I pick up this blade, to heal. To never harm." She moves a half step closer and shares a glance with Jax before turning back to Red. "You don't get to pick where you come from, Red. No one does. For good, or ill, we do not have that freedom. What we do have the freedom to do is decide how it shapes our lives. People think that we are what we become, but they're wrong," her voice is quietly emphatic now. "We become what we are, at the core. Life, death, love, hate, loss, joy, every day wear and tear, it pares away the soft edges that surround us until what we are, at the core, what we have always been, is revealed. You decide what you do with the truth of yourself, and for good or ill, you stare that truth down, in the mirror, every day. It's the bravest thing that we do, Red, staring into ourselves. That, and love. It's the second most difficult thing we do, every day. Learning how to love ourselves before we dare to love anyone else."
Once again, that little flinch, echoing in the Lekku. Red...A'isha listens, does not pull away. She can see how much it cost the man to be close. Close to IT. She blinks slowly as she listens first to Jax then to Meave. When they finish there is long silence, broken only by her soft breathing. Even her Lekku are still. She takes a breath, speaks. "I...we will not leave you. Loranna, Strand, all of you are family." One thing changes, slowly, subtly. Her eyes. Still brilliant, but with flecks of viridian now. Her voice loses that edge, but does not gain the sultry tones either. Perhaps a new mask? Or a glimpse of synthesis. "You are right, we have choices. We take risks. I do not know why you feel things I cannot. But I...will remenber what you both have said. The truth of it." Her hands cover each of theirs, slim finger, tipper with sharp black nails squeeze. Her touch is warm. She blinks and looks away now, suddenly conscious of the tears...
Jax nods and gives her a weak smile. "If Ax is right and I'm not saying he is. Spend some time away from it. Just cause you can't feel it. Don't mean it's whispering lies to you. Hide it somewhere where it's not on you all the time or where you live. Theres a word they used back in my Corsec days Insidious. That may be what that thing is. Don't let it poison you little by little. I'm going to go lay down. I don't feel so hot." He looks to Mae, "Doc. You win. How many credits we had on this game." He says as he goes to lay down.
Mae's eyes scan Red's face as she speaks, her own eyes narrowing ever so subtly, barely discernible really, as she studies the minute changes in Red's expression, body language, even the color of her eyes and the subtle twitches of lekku, the movement of Red's fingers. She makes a quiet hum of sound even as she rests her free hand lightly on Red's shoulder, "Keep making the choices that lead you to you," she advises before stepping back a measure then eyeing Jax next. "You know I'd have to win several more games before we're even on the level to the point where you'd owe me any credits. You look beat, go on. Get some rest."
Facing away, She does not note Maeves reactions. Red takes a deep breath gives their hands a final squeeze, then moves to the door. It hisses open for her. Stepping forward, she looks back eyes still that bright gold, fleck with green. "I will...try, Jax. It is just that...Ax mentioned, he might have a way to...cleanse it." She shakes her head, Lekku writhing. "I will do nothing to endanger any of you, I swear it." With that the Lethan slips through the door with soundless grace.
Jax Greystorm calls out behind her. "Don't do anything to endanger you. You are precious to us." Then he collapses back on the couch. "I'm worried about her Doc."
